As a rule, I don’t talk religion or politics on my blog, or Twitter and Facebook. However, this article on the bullying of gay teens has enraged me to the point that I have to speak out about this.

Some personal background before I begin however: I’m 36 years old. I’m bisexual. I’m Catholic. I’ve taught at a Catholic school. And right now I’m a PhD student working on the issue of bullying and cyber bullying. I was bullied as a kid. I was called “lesbian” before I even knew what a lesbian was; I had to go home and look it up in the dictionary- true story. I’ve never flaunted my sexuality. It’s a personal thing for me and in my opinion no one’s business, except for myself and whomever I am dating. What goes on in the bedroom of ANYONE should stay there and is of no consequence to anyone but the partners involved.

That being said, there is an epidemic of LBGT teens committing suicide, having suicidal thoughts, and involved in para-suicidal behaviours. They feel alone, targeted, and often feel they have no one to talk to, no one to go to, and they feel it will never get better. (Hence the It Gets Better project, which is invaluable.) But it can’t work if kids/teachers/parents are afraid to speak out because the school’s policies have an underlying current of discrimination because of the religious persuasion of the community. Policies that stated that school personnel had to “stay neutral” on issues regarding sexual persuasion. And I am sure that the community that the Rolling Stone article focused on is not the only one in the US, or around the world.

I’m sorry but this “neutral policy” is utter bullshit. Bullying whether due to religion, race, gender, sexual orientation, income, whether you are pink, purple, polka dotted is WRONG and should not be tolerated full stop. There is no reason to remain NEUTRAL. If a child is being called a dyke or a whore or the c word or the n word, it needs to be stopped. The bully needs to be punished and the victim needs to be reassured, protected, and helped- not ignored just because he or she may or may not be gay, Jewish, African American, or any other designation under the sun.

The victims are being made to feel ashamed and worthless, and feel they have no other form of recourse than to take their own lives because the adults in their life are powerless to take the steps to speak out against policies that are vague at best. Policies of any kind of discrimination have no place in public schools. Policies that are neutral or anti-gay in public schools HAVE NO PLACE. There is a separation of church and state in the US for a reason. Policies that are influenced by religion have no place in public schools.

Children should feel safe in school. They should not fear walking down the hall or going into the bathroom. They should be able to be individuals, and be themselves and not fear slurs being shouted at them, texted to them, or written on their Facebook walls.

Jesus said, “Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.” I think this needs to be remembered by those who wish to condemn students who may be different, for whatever reason. No child, no student, no human being should have to be made to feel that they are as lesser person because of their sexual orientation. And no more should have to commit suicide because they feel there is no way out. I think members of the religious right, and those who wish to push their beliefs should think about that the next time they condemn someone who is “different.”

Hello! It’s been a while since I have had a chance to update, basically b/c I don’t have internet in the flat as of yet (and not until the 28th! Grrrr! I must contact them and see if they can move it up!). So, we have moved and I’ve been organizing/cleaning/putting things away and getting things needed. Tomorrow we get the stuff out of storage and I can finally hang up all my clothes as all the hangers are in storage.

Here are some pictures of the flat!

I do have some interesting posts planned to go up soon on bullying and the religious right, the biggest loser and extreme exercise, and my own struggles in losing weight so please stay tuned.

How long have you ever gone without internet in the home? Did it make you nuts?

Flat: We have put the deposit down on the flat, and hopefully should be moving 1st February if not sooner, which is what I wish. My back is not a big fan of the crappy mattress at the hostel.

Illness: I guess I am back to about 95%. My throat hurts sometimes when I wake up but I think that has to do with the ridic heat/dryness at said hostel.

Working out: Well, suffice to say I haven’t done anything other than walking about since the 10K. Now that I don’t feel like utter crap, I plan to either start running again (weather permitting) or hitting the gym. While I am still not within walking distance of uni, I have a 5 day pass to a gym close to the hostel I will be using ASAP.

Uni: I met with my professor. I have to rework my proposal and whatnot and we are meeting again next week. Unfortunately I cannot locate my proposal AT ALL. I don’t even have a hard copy; I looked through all the paperwork I had here. Unless it is hidden away somewhere and I have no idea where that would be, I am kind of screwed. I can rewrite it, but I preferred not to reinvent the wheel and just wanted to edit the old one. So I have started over. I have 71 words written. Great start, right?

Still looking into getting a new computer. My old Dell laptop is slow and the cable doesn’t stay plugged in. I will get one with my office, but it won’t be “mine,” nor will it be a laptop. Also I don’t know when space will be allocated for me.

Fandom: Still a Cumberbitch. I can’t help it. I clearly need help, stat.

And I am off to get some errands done.

I was actually almost in a good mood yesterday. I posted what I thought was a fascinating post {ok not fascinating per say, but funny ha ha} but clearly the joke is on me. And then I went to the store and found that no jackets fit me at all. Nope. None. Zilch. Zero. Way to reduce my already fragile self-esteem to naught. I’m so glad I spent that what 5-6 weeks running and trying hard- just proving the fact that I’m utterly useless at changing how I look.

And now this.

2 page views, which were probably me checking to make sure the pictures had aligned right.

Way to make a girl feel special.

I know it comes across as whiny and pedantic to bitch and complain about readership or lack thereof. But seriously? What is the point of this? What is the point of me? Why do I continue to keep this site, if it is just for me to espouse what I think is interesting or important, especially if I feel like I am just talking to myself?

I know I don’t really have a blog genre; I blog about many different things. Perhaps I just thought I was more interesting than I really am. Perhaps the site stats are bust and really, lots and lots of people are reading these words and the comments are just lost in the void. But I think not.

It’s something to think about. Whether I want to stay and continue to elucidate about all things Cindy, or if I just want to consider throwing in the towel, that resurrecting neophytegirl was a failed experiment. Or maybe I just think I am far more funny and interesting than I really am and that no one wants to read about my fandom likes or why I’m sad or why I can’t get over xyz.

I just don’t know.

(Apologies to everyone who thinks I am a nutter and the fact that I have a new addiction which doesn’t please everyone.) TL:DR, unless you want to see how I’ve become a crazy DT obsessed PhD candidate who’s also a Cumberbitch, as well as who the fuck else knows what else!

When I like things, I go all in. Always have, always will. As I was walking to campus I was thinking about how this long, strange journey began, and figured since I can’t find my frigging research proposal I should use my time wisely here.

It started early, in 3rd/4th grade with a show that probably wasn’t age appropriate, but when have I ever done anything normal. Normal is SO boring. (OMG Dallas is coming back! Eeeee!) (Yes, Dad they got Larry Hagman out of his wheelchair, just like Paul- oh wait not like Servalan is a spring chicken any more!)

I wrote fanfic for Dallas in elementary school, so much to the point that I was asked to find an outlet for my creativity in a different way.

So I moved on to . . . . .

Ok, so it was more . . . .
to the point that as an 11 year old I got to meet Paul Darrow, and my fangirling knew no bounds since that day. My dad got us tickets to a convention and I almost got to meet Jon Pertwee that day as well, but he was ill and not in attendance. A long time passed until I had another chance to meet anyone, but that day stands out in my memory very clearly.

I was pretty much a Blake’s 7 fangirl up until middle school, when I discovered something new.

I was INXS mad in the 7th grade. For Christmas that year I got all their cassettes and an INXS tshirt. (I may talk trash about my dad, but he’s always enabled me in my fangirling LOL.) I need to find that polaroid of me in the tshirt!

The fangirling pretty much was dormant in high school and college. I liked things, but I had discovered real life boys at that point and managed to take my crazy behaviours to new levels I can say I’m fairly ashamed of, hindsight being what it is and all.

Until I watched House, I was a pretty normal person. Since, I have to say that I do get a bit mad crazy over things. Just a bit. I was completely mental over Dr. House and began to try out my creativity in the realm of fanfiction again. Yes, it was House/Wilson 99% of the time, and no you can’t read any of it, unless you know where to look and no, I am not going to tell you b/c it’s rubbish.

I can’t say it was any good, but what I can say is that my fanmix, Afterglow, a Amber/Wilson (a bit of House), was downloaded like crazy and people really liked it. The music featured songs from House’s Head/Wilson’s Heart, along with other songs I found appropriate for the ending of season 4, an ending I can’t bring myself to watch.

About the same time, I had a chance opportunity to see INXS perform an acoustic set and from the day I laid eyes on JD Fortune, I went a bit crazy (again). This brought about a resurgence of my love for INXS, as well as crazy road trips to CT, NYC (I WAS ON THE TODAY SHOW!) (For 5 seconds!) (for a second, do shut up Cindy) and up to Canada for crazy drunk fun, tattoos, and booze all over the carpark. As well as zany things that happened, like this.

Fuck off, eh!

Also, at the same time, I realized that I could bitch about sports, or I could STFU and join in. Hence my love of all things Red Sox.

I’ve had a chance to see amazing things. Crazy blowout wins, long 14 inning games in the rain, Curt Schilling’s 200th win, ALDS game 1 in 2007, and opening day 2008. 2 World Series wins and 2 parades. Not to mention concerts with Bronson! And no, I never followed Curt Schilling around the Natick Mall. Nope. Not me. Never.

Over the past few years, I’ve tried to rein in my crazy fangirl tendencies. However, that didn’t work. It all started with . . . a skinny Scottish bloke with REALLY great hair.

Oh David Tennant, you sexy man you. (I can hear my sister rolling her eyes.)

And before you all ask, no I didn’t come to Scotland b/c of DT. Seriously.

Anyways, it’s been DT for a while now, but then I watched Life on Mars and Ashes to Ashes and Mad Dogs and went a bit cray cray for John Simm and Philip Glenister. (It’s nice to know that I always seem to fall for older, although only slightly now, British men)

I’ve been watching everything I could get my hands on featuring the 2 of them. And then watching it some more. If Mad Dogs had been on VHS there’d be a tear in the tape by now.

However, my most recent obsesion (much to the chagrin of some of my friends) has been another British bloke with great hair- and cheekbones to die for.

Yes, I’ve become a Cumberbitch. (And hey, he’s single now, so . . . .) I’ve watched Sherlock more times than is probably healthy, and I’ve become addicted to tumblring his image all over the internets. (Oh honey, you should see ME in a crown.) (Yes, I know he didn’t say that line) (I have an unhealthy obsession with parentheses.)

Anyways, if you got this far, you are probably as bored as I am or procrastinating or think I’m mental. Probably. But I’ve met David Tennant. Hugh Laurie stood next to me. In fact, I’ve met 2 Doctors, 2 companions, saw INXS in London – all in the last year. So pretty ace, I’d say. It’s been a long crazy ride. I wonder where it will take me next?

Today was busy, for me at least recently. Despite still feeling like crap and pouring rain and sleet, I knew we had to go out for a number of reasons. Coffee, getting to uni and getting Steph a letter proving she completed her M.Litt, meeting with my advisor, picking up dinner food. So all of that was done, along with trying to get the flat reserved, which won’t be 100% resolved until tomorrow.

Since I’ve been back in the UK, I’ve been using my UK debit card. Well, the bank noticed this and put a hold on my account, so that when we tried to reserve the flat, it kept getting declined despite the fact I had 3x the amount available in my account. I got it resolved on the bank side, but it still wouldn’t go through. So tomorrow we have to go and give it to them in cash.

The meeting with my advisor was fine. I get a {shared} office where I can work in the education building! That’s pretty exciting. I have work I have to do now, so I will be trying to get to campus a few times next week.

Hopefully the flat thing works out and then we can start to plan the move. I cannot wait to get out of the hostel. The bed is doing my back in, and they don’t get Sky, so I can’t watch Mad Dogs. Clearly this is a HUGE issue. I need my Simm and Glenister fix!

I’ve neglected my poor blog for a variety of reasons. 1. I have had limited internet. 2. I’ve been sooo sick. I thought it was nothing, that I was just being all dizzy and feeling crappy for no reason, but then I realized that duh, my ear is killing and is blocked, no wonder I have no equilibrium and feel like the room is spinning. I ended up figuring this out on a Friday, after the GP was closed. So Saturday am I called NHS 24 and I was told to go to Western General emergency GP clinic and there I was evaluated and assessed and told I had an ear infection {really, I had no idea.}. Unfortunately, I have really not felt much better and I have felt like crap for a week now. I do feel a little better, but my right ear is still blocked and I have trouble hearing out of it and my general energy and enthusiasm levels are less than stellar.

Then, there was yesterday’s freak out about my student loan deposit and subsequent nervous breakdown. In the end, it was fine and all has been sorted and whatnot.

The past 2 days I have been able to get out and run errands and things that I’ve needed to do which is good. Tomorrow I am meeting with my advisor to start discussing what it is I am actually doing.

So that’s about it.

I’m in Glasgow! Horray!

Ok I have been here for a week, and I have been pretty busy looking for flats, trying to get things for school set up, going to Boots and Tesco, and having some sort of weird vertigo thing for the past 2 days, which hasn’t helped matters. It has been rather nice; sunny and cold which works fine for me. I need to get a picture of the sunrise or sunset over the River Clyde. Being on the 8th floor gives us great views, but the windows are dirty which is why I haven’t taken any as of yet. I’ve done a fair amount of walking, but I haven’t run since the 10K. Eep! I do have a pass for 5 free days at LA Fitness in Glasgow, so as soon as this dizziness thing sorts it self out, I can get my running on! {Or at the very least run along the river while it’s nice and sunny!}

So far I am waiting on my loans, so we can get a flat, and I can get some more clothing! I didn’t bring a lot of my stuff and I would like to get some basics of long sleeved tops and a pair of jeans and some wellies before I get too caught up in school.

I’ve been reading a lot as well, as I am not sure how much time I will have for it. If anyone has any recommendations about schooling and education in the UK, I would love to read them. Most of my knowledge is fiction based from Waterloo Road and an old copy of Scottish Education I had rattling around the old flat. I’d like something a bit more contemporary and not too dry. {I’m not asking much!}

I hope everyone is having a great week!

The next time I post, it will be from Scotland. I am not sure when it will be, but I will try to make it soon.

See you on the other side of the pond!

Yesterday I ran a 10K as part of the home for the holidays virtual 10K. I wanted to do it on Christmas but it just wasn’t in the cards.

I had to work yesterday and I had a later start than I intended, so I knew I needed to move quickly. I headed to the windy track and got started. I had some technical malfunctions so that I had to reset my timer twice. This annoyed me b/c then I had to do some math to make sure I had the actual 10K mileage.

It was cold in the suburbs of Boston, so I wanted to keep moving as much as I could. So I pretty much alternated run for one song, walk for the next and on and on. Depending on the length of the song I would sometimes run for 2 or more. As I got warmer and comfortable, I felt like I could go on for even longer than the 10K, which is encouraging considering 2 months ago, running for 30 seconds was torture. I also wanted to go as quickly as possible because I needed to get back home and get ready for work. I can’t believe I ran a 10K before working a 5 hour shift on my feet the day after Christmas. Who am I? I am pleased I did it in under 2 hours and felt amazing the entire time. I hope to run an actual 10K when I get back to Scotland.

I look like a total dork in this photo, but there wasn’t anyone around to take a picture, and I don’t have a full length mirror.

I feel fine today my feet and legs do not hurt at all. This is the first day in ages that my feet aren’t hurting. Wow. Apparently I needed to run 6 miles and then work all afternoon in my nice boots to make my feet not hurt. Totally random.

I really wanted to run today, but I am watching my nieces and there was no way I was getting up at like 6am to run. I won’t be running until Friday when I have a day off.

I could use a nap right now actually.